Why Time and Relationships Don’t Mix
It’s a common cause of strife in our love relationships that we have expectations about our partners in regards to time. We want them to commit to staying with us for the rest of our lives. We want them to commit to meeting our expectations and being a certain type of person for this same length of time. We want them to make choices that suit our need to keep them close and involved in our lives for perpetuity.
Inevitably, in trying to meet these desires, misery results. None of us can promise not to change or to have our needs and aspirations remain stable over time. None of us can promise to be in each other’s lives forever or to remain in a state of suspended animation – always responding to our partners the way we did when we first met.
When we try to be all things to each other, we step off of the path our souls chose. When we consider our actions in light of the reactions of others, we stop listening to our intuition – which essentially knows what will make us happy in the long run.
Instead of trying to hang on to each other and to our beliefs about commitment and stability, we can explore instead the idea of people as energy.
If you have done the work to love and accept yourself, and you recognize that you deserve love, you can expect it to come to you in various forms throughout your life. Therefore, if a partner should leave you for any reason, and you believe in your ability to attract love, you can rest assured that it will find you in some form or other.
What would happen if we all just stopped clinging to one another, using each other as security blankets, and instead trusted that the universe will provide all the love and support that we need when we need it?
Then, when we find ourselves on our own, we would know and accept that, at that moment, that independence was necessary for our development. Then, when someone comes along, we’d recognize that we were ready for interdependence – as there’s something to be learned from that exercise as well.
We’d come to recognize the wave reaction of universal energy. Sometimes, we find ourselves alone. Sometimes, we’re meant to learn in concert with each other. We’d allow people to come in and out of our lives like the ebb and flow of the tide. We’d welcome them in, and wish them well when they leave. We’d stop hanging on. We’d stop blaming and hurling anger at others for disappointing us, for growing in a new direction, for failing to remain the people we felt they should be.
When we take ‘time’ out of the equation, when we accept that each person we meet is in our lives only as long as we require them to be, when we recognize that the universe supports and speaks to us through many people, when we welcome that love and support in whatever form it chooses to appear, we find peace. We find love in its divine form. We let go – and we welcome in the All.